Coaching Tips by Shahrukh Khan

Last Sunday while rummaging through a pile of old and discarded stuff in the attic of my house, I chanced upon a CD of the Shahrukh Khan starrer Chakde India!  Thank God! I finally found it; it had been eluding me for long.

So after a sumptuous lunch of “machcher jhol and bhaat” (fish curry and rice), I plunked myself on the couch and for the next couple of hours was mesmerized by the movie’s story line and of course Shahrukh’s histrionics.

Kabir Khan (Shahrukh’s character in the movie) was ostracized by the media and the country for conceding a goal and subsequently the championship against arch rivals Pakistan in the men’s hockey world cup. The rumor mills had it that he was in cahoots with the Pakistan hockey board. He was labeled a traitor and goes into self imposed exile.

The movie is the story of his return from exile to coach a motley group of women hockey players for the world championship. Winning the world cup would be his way of salvaging lost pride and silencing his critics.

What is it that makes the movie great viewing? Apart from the excellent story line, near perfect performances by the star cast, there is a wealth of corporate knowledge to be gleaned from it – I found it to be an excellent read on the principles of coaching.

We all agree that coaching is a serious business! For trainers, FLMs and quality coaches it is part of their daily bread and butter. If done in the right way, coaching can make all the difference to an organization’s bottom line.

Well let us see how Kabir Khan goes about coaching sixteen hockey players from different states of India and turns them into a world class team who go on to win the women’s hockey world championship; a tournament they enter as underdogs.

Right credentials and fire in the belly

A coach has to have the right qualifications for the job. As an ex-hockey player Kabir was the perfect fit as the coach of the Indian women’s hockey team. Being Asia’s best centre forward during his playing days he belonged to the “been there, done that” school.

He also knew the criticality of what he was getting into and had prepared hard enough for the coaching job. During his first interview with the hockey association; when one of the members asked where had he been for the last seven years (seven years, three months and fourteen days to be precise) he replies: “…is meeting ki tyari mein…”

As coaches; apart from subject matter expertise what also matters is guts and gumption. They come in real handy while coaching a team which is almost at the bottom of the heap. A coach should also be adept in handling ridicule and comments like the one by the association member (“…aisi team joh European desho ke school teams ke saath bhi nahi khel sakti…”)

Add to this the coach being a risk lover. This could be to try out a new technique, challenge prevailing norms, break prejudices or even silence rising opposition within his team.

Asking his most experienced player Bindiya Naik to sit on the bench or accepting the challenge of playing against the men’s team; Kabir showed enough nerves!  Playing  against the men’s team earned him a ticket to the world cup and yes he was able to teach Bindiya that individual egos have no place when playing as a team.

Set the bar high and unite the team for a common goal

A coach is not worth his salt if he gets balked by hurdles. Winning the women’s world hockey championship was no child’s play yet Kabir states very audaciously:”…Jo nahi ho sakta, wahi toh karna hai…”

Our teams might be plagued by many ills. Intra team rivalries, ego clashes between the experienced folks, lackadaisical attitude to perform at the highest level, lacking the right technique or even language constraints may be few of them. The coach’s first job is to unite the team for a common cause. When Krishnaji Kabir’s assistant coach tells him that the hard practice is taking a toll on the girls and all of it might go against him as a coach, Kabir says: “…Agar mujhe apna dushman banake woh eik dusre ki dost ban sakti hai, toh team banane  ke liye yeh eik bahut hi choti si kimat hai…”

I also liked the scene in which Kabir asks the hockey players to introduce themselves. With each introduction he shows his displeasure until Vidya Sharma introduces herself:” …Vidya Sharma, India…”

His rebuke to the players hits the nail hard on the head: “…Mujhe states ke naam na sunayie dethe hai, na dhikaie dete hai. Sirf ek mulk-a-naam sunayie detha hai, I-N-D-I-A…”

He further thunders: “… ek baat achi tarah sun lijiye aur abhi samaj lijiye. Kyuki mai dubhara nahi bataunga. Is team ko sirf woh player chaiye jo pehle India ke liye khel rahe hai, phir apne sathiyon ke liye, uss ke baad bhi thodi bhahut jaan bach jaye toh apne liye….state govt. ki naukri ya railway flat k liye nahi …

Know your team’s capabilities

Coaches should also have an understanding of each of the member’s strengths and weaknesses. Kabir displays this remarkable understanding when he fields Bindiya Naik against the Korean team’s man to man marking strategy. He tells her: “…is wakht India ko apne sabse jyada experienced player ki jaroorat hai…man to man marking kaise thodi jaati hai sirf tum jaanti ho…match shuru ho raha hai…jao aur thodo…”

When the team from Argentina famous for their rough hockey seems unstoppable; Kabir unleashes the Punjabi lass Balbir on to them. “…Balbir tum apni game khelo… woh do mare tum chaar maro, woh chaar mare tum aaght maro…”

Such an inherent understanding of the team’s capabilities is required to ensure everyone plays his/her part and contributes to the team’s overall success plan.

Practice hard and challenge the team’s limit

The Chinese military proverb says: “The more we sweat in training; the less we bleed in battle”. Absolutely true!  As in war so in competitive sports.

There can be only one substitute for practice and that is more practice. So if it is waking up at 4 a.m. in the morning and running twenty kilometers to build one’s stamina so be it. And practice is a must for all – whether you are a newbie or an experienced player.

So when one of the players Nethra Reddy falls unconscious due to practice Kabir shouts at everyone: “…kya dekh rahe ho use…behosh hui hai mari nahin hai woh…”

Kabir’s methods of course do not find favor with everyone especially the senior players and earn him the sobriquet “Tughlak”. Bindiya Naik who plays for Indian Railways at the national level is his strongest detractor. She along with Aaliya Bose and Gunjan Lakhani the other two senior players pose a big threat to Kabir’s plan of uniting the team for a common cause. Kabir sends a strong message to the entire team by asking Bindiya and Aaliya to sit on the bench till the time they mend their ways.

Have values and hold them tight

A strong value system will always hold a coach in good stead. It is not just in the coaching arena but also in one’s personal life. When Bindiya Naik hints that she can go to any length to become the team’s captain and confronts Kabir by asking: “main captain kyo nahi ban sakti…captain banne ke liye joh woh kar rahi hai main bhi kar sakti hoon…” he very stoically answers back: “…jawab tumne khud de di…”

Had Kabir fallen; it would have been a very precipitous one.

Let the team bask in the glory of success

When the women’s team returns with the championship title and the entire country is singing paeans about their exploits; Kabir is nowhere to be seen. The same media which had blasted him once was going gaga over him. He had courted disaster before and hence knew well how to woo triumph. And that is what I believe to be the hallmark of an effective coach. The team had toiled hard for this and it was their moment of success – no one should usurp it from them. Not even their coach!

So that is how I spent a great Sunday afternoon with Shahrukh Khan and in the bargain learnt few amazing coaching principles. This movie may not be a gospel on the principles of coaching but it does teach us a thing or two on how to effectively coach teams for optimum performance. Hail King Khan!

Image Courtesy :srktimes.com

The Thirsty Crow

Books have always been my best buddies. I grew up on a healthy diet of “Aesop’s Fables” and “Jataka” and “Panchatantra” stories. During my school days I was a regular subscriber of the popular children magazines “Chandamana” and “Lotpot.”  On most of the Sundays and school holidays I would frequent the local library to borrow “The Adventures of Tintin” and “Amar Chitra Katha” comic books.

One of my favorite childhood stories is the “The Thirsty Crow” from Aesop’s Fables. I have read it many times and with every read it reveals something new and interesting.  For the benefit of those who are yet to read here is the story:

“A crow perishing with thirst saw a pitcher, and hoping to find water, flew to it with delight. When he reached it, he discovered to his grief that it contained so little water that he could not possibly get at it. He tried everything he could think of to reach the water, but all his efforts were in vain. At last he collected as many stones as he could carry and dropped them one by one with his beak into the pitcher, until he brought the water within his reach and thus saved his life.”

Come let us un-ravel the fascinating elements of this fable. To breed familiarity let us call the crow – Kalu and assume he is from the dusty by lanes of north India.  Now anyone who resides in north India knows that the land there can become really hot during summers.  To add to this problem is the acute water shortage – rivers, ponds and reservoirs run dry. The water in the tap turns into a trickle and finally vanishes. For the avian population these months can be very agonizing.

That day the sun was beating down with all its might. Not a soul was to be seen on the roads except the lone stray cows. Kalu had been searching for water to drink since morning. But there was none to be found. A few households would keep water in an earthen tray and place it either on a window sill or parapet for the birds; but that day even they were dry!

Tired and exhausted Kalu perched on the branch of a tree to rest for a while. Thud!! A loud noise broke the afternoon silence.  One of neighborhood crows had fallen dead due to the extreme heat. Kalu did not want to meet the same fate. He decided to find water at any cost.

Life can at times be very cruel. There will be situations completely outside our control. We may fret, fume, tear our hair, beat our chest and wail loudly “Why me?” but things may still remain the same. Seeing one of your own die in front of your eyes can be very painful. Yet Kalu chose not to sit and brood over it or let the impending danger of water scarcity frighten him. He decided to use the weapon nature had bestowed him - the freedom of choice. He chose to fight! He chose to live!

So Kalu flew again from one roof top to another, one village to another, over dry ponds and parched fields. From the top he scoured every inch of the area for water. He could see women walking miles in search of water with earthen pots delicately balanced on their heads and children in tow. At times Kalu would rest for a while on a broken hand pump. Yet he could not find water; neither in any of the hand pumps nor anywhere!

He had flown over a couple of houses when he noticed a nondescript and ramshackle building just around the corner. He was about to skip and fly over it when something caught his eye. Curiosity got the better of him and he flew inside.  What he saw almost took his breath away! He started flapping his wings in excitement.

In one corner of the building there was a pitcher and lo and behold it contained water! Kalu thought he would faint with joy. He had at last found the elixir of life. He was about to make a dash for the pitcher when he noticed something unusual. There were few birds sitting on the rim of the pitcher and peeping in. One of them seemed to be saying something and the others were nodding their heads. Few were on the floor next to the pitcher and talking in hushed tones. A couple of crows seemed very angry. They were pecking at the pitcher in exasperation as if they wanted to break it. Strange! Why were the birds not drinking water?  Kalu decided to go near the pitcher. Alas! The water level was so low that none of birds could reach below to drink it.

Life’s paradoxes! There are instances galore when life throws up such situations with unabashed alacrity. When we are so near; yet so far from the solution we are searching.  And like the birds in the building we wonder what is happening or why is it happening to us? We resign ourselves to fate. Few of us sulk in a corner, few vent out anger like the crows pecking at the pitcher. Imagine Kalu’s plight. He was half dead due to thirst and exhaustion. He had been searching for water since morning and now he finds it only to realize he cannot drink it. This can break even a diehard optimist. So what does he do?

By now only Kalu remained in the building. The others had flown away in frustration. One of the crows even asked Kalu to come with him and forget the water as it was not fit for drinking. But Kalu was undeterred. He perched on the rim of the pitcher and started thinking hard. Time was running out; he could barely manage another hour without water. The thirst and sheer exhaustion had clouded his faculties and he found it increasingly difficult even to stay put. Yet he thought and thought, there has to be a way out of this he kept telling himself. Suddenly there was a splash! A loud one! Something had fallen in the pitcher. Due to this couple of drops of water rose and fell on Kalu. Initially he did not seem to notice and then, suddenly everything became crystal clear. His eyes lit up! On peeping inside he saw that a corner of the edge of the pitcher had broken and fallen in.

The entire tangent of Kalu’s thinking changed. If an object which falls inside the pitcher can make water drops rise; then by dropping more of such objects the level can be raised even higher. High enough for him to drink water comfortably. This was like manna from heaven. Kalu knew he would no longer die of thirst. Not only his but other lives could be saved!

Paulo Coelho in the “The Alchemist” says “And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” All Kalu did was to just hang on. His calm demeanor, ability to think and non quitter attitude when faced with challenge turns him into a super crow; isn’t it? I don’t think so. Look at this way. Was the situation any different to the other birds and crows? Was the sun more benevolent to the others than it was to Kalu? So why did the others flee and not Kalu? Why did he not give up or listen to the crow who told him that the water was not fit to drink? Kalu was not a super crow but he sure knew a thing or two about psychology – more than the situation it is the reaction to it that matters most.

Kalu had won half the battle. He had found water and he knew that by dropping objects into the pitcher the level would come up high enough for him to drink. But what would he drop in the pitcher and how? He looked for something that he could find handy to hold in his beak, fly with it and then drop it in the pitcher.

Now the building where Kalu found the pitcher was in a pitiable condition.  The roof had caved in, the plaster on the walls was peeling off and there were huge cracks on the walls and gapes on the floor. Pebbles were strewn all over. Kalu picked up a pebble with his beak and dropped it in the pitcher. Just as he had thought, the water rose a bit. Kalu went ecstatic. He picked another pebble and dropped it too. The water level rose again. With a new found energy Kalu started picking pebbles and dropping them in the pitcher with gusto. With every rise in the water level he found his hopes rising. He became so engrossed that he did not even realize that the water level had come up to the brim. Kalu drank to his heart’s content. That day the water tasted extra sweet.

Jimmy Dean (the US country music singer) said, “I can’t change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.”  Kalu is not like us. He does not know how to crib, throw tantrums or sit and sigh and moan. He does not know how to curse his maker for a beak which is not suitable for picking pebbles. His bird instinct tells him just one thing - events that happen in a crow’s life are not in his control however; what is in his control is how he reacts to them, how well he utilizes things at his disposal and turns disadvantage in to advantage.

So that is my import from “The Thirsty Crow.”  Also, what is your guess? Do you think Kalu is educated? I don’t think so at least not in the way we pride ourselves in being educated. Actually the prevailing system of education is not even geared to provide us with life saving or problem solving skills; the one which Kalu exhibited. I think Kalu is a smart crow who knows how to live his bird life to the hilt.

By the way, what is a group of crows called?

It is called a “murder.”

Weird, isn’t it?

Photo Courtesy :

espliego.wordpress.com

The Final Destination

Phatik Ganguly is the caretaker of the Brabourne road cemetery. For the past twenty five years Phatikbabu is taking care of the dead, literally! He has a room in the compound and his personal interests (of whatever few he has) are met by the honorarium paid by the trust responsible for running the cemetery.  He ensures upkeep of the compound, waters the plants, keeps a check on vagabonds or ruffians who will not leave any grave stone unturned to encroach on the property, drives away stray animals that saunter in and provide the necessary service to people who need to use the cemetery.  The cemetery is not in use much. There is hardly any space. Whatever is left has been kept lest someone walk in with a recommendation. Surprising! Recommendations help us even after we die!  A proposal to get more land is lying with the local municipal authorities. But like all government files and projects which never see light of the day, this too has very slim chances unless some local heavyweight or a politician takes fancy with the issues of the dead!

Phatikbabu hardly has any visitors calling on him. Except for Dinu who brings him his daily lunch and dinner, there is Sujoyda another octogenarian and Phatikbabu’s classmate, who comes for the occasional hookah and chitchat. However for the last couple of days Phatikbabu has a new friend. Initially the man would come in at around four–thirty, very quietly walk towards one of the grave stones and silently sit there. For the first couple of days Phatikbabu did not want to bother him, but when the visits became regular he decided to inquire more.

Aroon Sarkar, Phatikbabu had to cajole him to know his name, is in his late thirties. With a stooping figure, droopy eyes, a receding hairline Aroon seemed to melt in the surroundings of the cemetery.  When the sun shone on his bald plate it seemed to emit a strange light. This was the only light that emanated from Aroon, everything else about him was sad. He hardly ever spoke except the monosyllabic answers in response to Phatikbabu’s questions. Aroon is an English teacher at the municipal school. He is unmarried and lives in a one room apartment in the old city. Of whatever meager he earned, he kept a little for himself and the rest he donated to a local orphanage.

Every day at four-thirty in the evening Aroon would enter the cemetery compound.  After a quick nod at Phatikbabu he would walk to the corner of the cemetery. He would always bring a bunch of white lilies and lay them at the grave of Roopa Sarkar. Lilies were her favorite flowers.

Roopa Sarkar was Aroon’s mother.  Not many people would know her by her maiden name. She was Roopa the yesteryears movie star. A woman of astounding beauty, during her heydays she had the Calcutta public eating out of her hands. More than her stardom she made headlines with her whirlwind romance with one of the most influential man in the city. However things did not work between them as desired. When things turned sour the man used his influence and clout to ensure Roopa lose out on all her movie offers. Relations between them reached its nadir with the birth of Aroon. The man feared Roopa would use the baby to extract money out of him. The rumors had it that he even sent hired goons to get Roopa and the child eliminated.

Roopa was a lady of iron will. She quit films and decided to bring up Aroon as a single mother. Not that it was easy. Many wanted to help her. Roopa was clever enough to see through the façade. She stayed away from one and all. She was ostracized from society, her trusted aides who during her good times swore by her, deserted her one by one. There were days when she and Aroon went hungry yet she never lost her dignity. She clung on to her faith and her ability to rise above all odds saw them through the worst of times. Her hard work paid when Aroon got a job at the local municipal school.

However all this had a toll on her health. She had a wiry frame and was prone to bouts of depression. During her movie days she would smoke occasionally. Due to the depression she picked it up again. The doctors advised her against it many times, but she would never pay heed to them. She said this was the only luxury she permitted herself. The heavy smoking damaged sixty percent of her lungs. She died in sleep due a massive heart attack.

Aroon’s world came to an end with Roopa’s death. He had read somewhere “God could not be everywhere so he made mothers”. He found this coming true in his life. His mother’s entire life was one of struggle. Things which were taken for granted in other households were a luxury for them. All the trial and tribulations went by this mother son duo turned Aroon into a sensitive person. He grew up to be introspective. One could find him sitting quietly lost in his thoughts. He often wondered on the purpose of his mother’s life. He could not fathom the treatment meted out to her by the man she loved and for whom she forsook her career. He had tried many times to know the antecedents of her life. He wanted her to tell him who his father was and why did he not stay with them?  Roopa never relented. She always avoided the topic. On being pestered too much she would tell him that his father had died while he was very young. Somehow Aroon could not make himself believe this.

While sitting at the foot of his mother’s grave he would wonder at the way his life had taken its course. The serenity of the cemetery was a perfect foil to his agitating mind. Aroon felt that the cemetery was a man’s final destination. It was very humbling here. The cemetery was a great leveler. It did not matter if you are a blue blood royalty, rich or poor, clergy or laity, prince or pauper. The cemetery meted the same treatment to everyone. No one jingles coins here. No one flaunts big cars here. You would not find any ostentatious display of wealth or any rowdy show of pseudo masochism. Time stood still here. There is no hurry of meeting deadlines; no pressure of being perfect. Death is the final perfection!

But if man knows that this is the inevitable, why does he behave insanely? Why is there mindless killing? Why is man baying for another’s blood in this “dog-eat-dog-world?” If we cannot carry all that we hoard during the lifetime, why don’t we see the futility of our actions? When immortality is Nature’s closely guarded secret never to be revealed to anyone, what prompts us to act so vainly?  What went in his father’s mind while he treated his mother so badly? Was the desire to control his mother a vain attempt to hide his own imperfections? He thought and thought but the answers eluded him.

After Roopa died Aroon decided to rent a portion of the house to someone in need. While he was clearing the room to be rented he chanced upon an iron chest. This one had escaped his attention while his mother was alive. Maybe she had kept it hidden from him. Besides old clothes, a few of his mother’s saris, in the chest he also found old magazines, newspaper clippings and a few letters written to her by one Indrajit Talukdar. Aroon immediately knew he had struck gold. He set out to find more about Indrajit.

Indrajit Talukdar was from a zamindar family. His father Mahendranath Talukdar had come to Calcutta during the partition. He had set up a rice mill and a sugar mill in the city. Being a god-fearing man Mahendranath had also set up free schools for the poor, opened many ashrams and day care centers. Due to his philanthropy Mahendranath was very popular. His well wishers asked him to contest the local municipal elections and he was elected the mayor of Calcutta.

Mahendranath had two sons and a daughter. Indrajit was his youngest son. He was a pampered child. Every wish of his was fulfilled even before he would say it. Servants were at his beck and call all through the day. He threw tantrums, became very violent if things were not to his liking. During his adolescent days he fell into bad company. Initially money was not a problem. Slowly when his demand for money could not be met by his father Indrajit got involved in nefarious activities such as land grabbing, extortion, and kidnapping. He did everything to bring infamy to his father's reputation. Things came to such a pass that Mahendranath disowned him. Seeing that he would lose out on such a huge inheritance Indrajit went to court against his father. He was helped in all these by his father’s political opponents and other relatives who were never happy with the rise of Mahendranath.

Indrajit was also into movie financing. In a ceremony to award movie stars he noticed Roopa. He was awe-struck by her dazzling beauty. She was new to tinsel town and would frequent such parties to seek audience with the leading directors and producers. She hoped to get work this way. Within minutes of seeing Roopa, Indrajit announced a new movie with Roopa as the leading lady. He signed the best crew. The movie also had a huge budget. The movie went on floors and on the pretext of overseeing production Indrajit started meeting Roopa every-day. As luck would have it Indrajit’s gamble paid off and the movie turned out to be blockbuster. Overnight Roopa was a sensation.

After the movie’s unprecedented success Roopa was flooded with more offers. She and Indrajit were now completely into each other. Her affair starting feeding the gossip mills and it soon became the talk of the town. But nobody dare say anything to them, not even Roopa’s family. Everyone knew Indrajit’s influence. It was said that Indrajit ensured many of Roopa’s competitors went without work. All of those movies came to her kitty. Everything went well for a couple of years. Then one day she discovered Indrajit was not only married but also had a child. When she confronted Indrajit about this he had no qualms in accepting it. He said it was none of her business to know about his past life. She should only be bothered about her stardom which was his mercy to her and no price is ever too high for Roopa to pay it. It did not matter much to him when Roopa told him that she was carrying his child, he asked her to drop it.

The jolt woke Roopa out of her reverie. Suddenly she felt she had been cheated. She told Indrajit that whatever happens she would never drop the child. Indrajit walked out of her life leaving her in the lurch. He also threatened her with dire consequences.

It was six-thirty now. Aroon has been in the cemetery for more than usual today. He felt a light tap on his shoulder. He turned around and saw the benign face of Phatikbabu. He asked Aroon to come and sit in his room then. A local politician had died and his body had come to the cemetery. But there is no space insisted Aroon, where will this body be laid? Phatikbabu asked him to not to meddle in affairs of the cemetery. Space would be made next to Roopa Sarkar’s grave. A few plots had been left to accommodate any such pressing need. Moreover he could not refuse as the trust has the final say in such matters. Without much ado Aroon got up and made a quiet exit.

The next morning the following newspaper headline caught his attention “Councilor brutally murdered in his sleep. Old animosity suspected.”  He was about to toss the newspaper away as such things had almost become routine, when the name of the councilor forbade him to do so. The fine print said “Indrajit Talukdar murdered in his sleep. A local miscreant stabbed him seventy two times before fleeing away. Nothing has been stolen. Tension grips south Calcutta, his constituency. Police have been deployed to prevent any untoward incident. Indrajit Talukdar has been  laid to rest in the Brabourne road cemetery….”

Aroon finally tossed the paper aside. He was getting late for school.

Nothing succeeds like success!

Paltu and Puttan were taking a leisurely stroll after their lunch on a May Sunday afternoon. More than cousins they were the best of buddies. Generally every week on Saturdays they would visit each other and then stay back for a sleepover. Both their fathers were sepoys in the Indian army and were posted in Meerut.

Now any one who has stayed in northern India during summers knows how hot it can be. Afternoons can be killing! Even birds and animals think twice before venturing out in the blazing sun. But not these boys. Come rain or shine - nothing could discourage them from spending time with each other. They simply loved to hang out together.

Suddenly a black Mercedes Benz E class zips past them. For a moment none could move. They were speechless with awe. After a moment Paltu tells Puttan " You know what Puttan, at times I wish my father had studied hard and was more successful. At least we would have settled for a Pajero!"

So this is how today's generation defines success. A multinational job, bigger car, spacious house, fatter paycheck, foreign travel. You become the toast and envy of your inner circle if you have all of these to boot. Hmm...don't trust me; please pick up any Sunday newspaper and read the matrimonial section. "Professionally qualified match for 6ft, 28yrs teetotaller IIT/IIM grad.;working in USA, earning 75lakhs/annum. Only IITs/IIMs need apply. Girl should be willing to relocate to US. Early marriage preferred." Poor girl! She seems to be buying a husband.

No doubt Paltu and Puttan and many more of their ilk are dazzled by the razzmatazz of the glitzy life that money provides. Everyone seems to be running after money, success, name and fame without even thinking if its worth it!

But is this success? Some one told me the other day " If you think money can't buy happiness then go to the right shop". No doubt money can buy everything today. From surrogate mothers to designer babies everything can be provided for. Recently there was this story about the multi-millionaire in the US who ordered the most expensive coffin for himself. Ever wonder about the multitude of people who cannot even afford a shelter over their head when they are alive. Who cares what happens when one dies?

So is this success? And what about the scores of people who died fighting for a cause?  No one remembers them.  There were thousands who did not hesitate to lay down their lives believing in a just cause. Gong by today's standards they cannot be called successful, can they? What will my so called successful friends say about Subhash Chandra Bose or Che Guevara?  Each lived and died for a cause. A cause they fiercely believed in. A cause for which each moved heaven and earth. A cause which finally consumed them.

And what about Paltu and Puttan's parents?  Dare they call themselves successful! You see they have no big car to flaunt. The blood, toil and tears which they shed everyday trying to stay put in a unjust world cannot be qualified as success. Eking out a living, providing a shelter for their families, a decent education for their children, saving a portion of the meagre they earn so that their daughters can be married properly - is this success? No their success parameters have already been defined by their own children!

Ralph Waldo Emerson said "Build a better mousetrap and the world will beat a path to your door." I have always known that better mouse trap is believing in a right cause even if one has to give up his life, loving till it hurts, caring for aged parents, bringing up a child with special needs, planting a tree, going for the early morning walk, expressing your love to your spouse or partner, watching the sunset, starting out on your own with nothing but hope in your heart, tending to the plants in your garden, giving birth to a healthy baby or simply leaving the world a bit better.  Remember you might not walk this path again!

Please do not misunderstand me. Earning money is not an anathema. But measuring the quality of your life with the amount of money you earn is. There can be no limit to what you earn. The quality of your dreams cannot be guaranteed by a silken night gown. A hard surface and a clear conscience can give you a better night's sleep than Valium! What is the guarantee that a Mercedes will fulfil all wishes? It will soon be replaced by a Bentley which will be replaced by a chopper. A chopper will soon give way to a private jet. A few days with the jet will pave the way for space travel. So what is the deal?

Poor Paltu ! He could never tell his parents that he loves theatre so much that he wants to pursue stage as a career.  That is his first love. And Puttan - he could never muster the courage to tell his father how crazy he is to take up a fine art course after school. Their filial obedience. They do not  have the heart to see the dreams of their parents shattered. Who cares if in the bargain their hopes and aspirations are lost? 

Paltu and Puttan will be successful one day. They will have everything that money can buy. A big mansion on an upmarket street and a big car in their garage. Their children will go to the most expensive school in the country. They will travel to the most exotic locale for their vacation and each might present their spouse the best gift money can buy. But they will not be the real Paltu or Puttan. For the real Paltu and Puttan will never grow up.This money minded and success oriented world will never let them grow up.

Meanwhile the Mercedes returns back. This time it screeches to a halt in front of the two starry eyed teenagers. A strapping six foot tall man with gelled hair steps out. He swears by Prada and Gucci. Politely he asks Paltu and Puttan if he could take them on a joy ride. 

Well tighten your seat belts Paltu and Puttan. Your journey on the success highway has just begun!

Hope to see you successful one day! 

The story of Pappu...

How many of you know Pappu? This guy can sing and dance though!  Our paths have crossed so many times that i know him personally now. Well he also lives near my house. He is almost a friend; at times he even  has the morning cuppa with us. You see, the wife has almost taken a fancy to him.

Surprising that you still do not recognize him. Does the name not ring a bell? Ok..ok let me tell you more about him. Pappu delivers the morning newspaper, brings in the milk, does the odd job, at times even fetches the kids from school. He also works at a tea stall, at times you can also spot him at the railway station as the shoe-shine boy.

Hmm..now i see you beaming. You remember him right, don't you? Yes, yes i know he is the one who deposits your monthly bills, harangues with the local rationwala on the demerits of adulteration, gets the groceries for you, and for a tenner would also give you a hot oil head massage.

But today Pappu is sad. "Coz it is raining outside. It has been pouring since morning and he could not go on his morning errand. Normally Sundays are week offs for him. But such Sundays are far and between. And when he does get one Pappu ensures he lives one to the hilt.

But it does not seem the usual Sunday. The sky has been overcast since morning. While going to bed he had sent a silent prayer heavenwards. But when is it that Pappu's prayers were answered?  He prayed when the local goons forcibly took away his sister. He again prayed when his mother was terminally ill. The last time he prayed was when the local politician's son ran his car over Pappu's sleeping father. The attorney backed by all the expensive education he had acquired asked " but why was the man sleeping on the pavement..?"  The politician's son was racing cars after a night of drunken revelry. He lost control over the car and Pappu lost his father. He had almost stopped praying till the last night. But like they say hope is what makes the world go round!

Yes Pappu hoped that his prayers would be answered this time. If it had not rained Pappu would have got up by 04:30 a.m.(although he is wide awake) and after having a jar of water and the leftovers of last night, would have slung his gunny sack over his shoulder and would have gone to the nearest garbage ground.

Did I see a grimace on your face? The yuck factor. You see these expressions are privy to the nouveau riche; what business do they have with the poor? For Pappu the garbage ground is like second home. Even before he could understand the strange ways of world he understood hunger pangs. This was the same place he would frequent when hunger become unbearable. For some one like Pappu the only place you can least expect a square meal a day is our discards.

Okay so let me tell you Pappu at times is the neighborhood scavenger. He rummages through garbage for plastic, polythene bags, old metal scraps, at times even food. If he is lucky to get a a good haul it might fetch him a  few hundred rupees at the local  kabariwala. 

But are you wondering what will Pappu do with the money? No no he will not gamble or spend it frivolously.  His need his more than anyone else. I am sorry if i make bold on that. Pardon me for my audacity. But the fact of the matter is Pappu badly needs the money. He is saving it for the treatment of his brother who is a paraplegic.

But today Pappu is still tossing in his bed. It is almost 07:00 a.m.and has started to brighten up with the morning light gaining control over the darkness of the night. This play of light over darkness...who know must have something hidden for Pappu. The rain has still not relented. Pappu finally gets out his bed and starts to pace up and down his little shanty. In between he keeps glancing now and then at his brother. He somehow cannot take his eyes off the serene face of his sleeping brother. He loves him more than anyone or anything in the world.

He quickly gets ready, slings the gunny bag over his shoulder and steps out. He remembers something and re-enters the room, bends down and kisses his brother's forehead. He is then out in a jiffy.

Well what is now going to happen is not something extra-ordinary. It is a common sight on Indian roads especially in areas where it rains incessantly. In fact it is so mundane that it hardly merits a dekko! Pappu who by now reaches the streets has in him a new vigor. With his pajamas rolled up to his knees and his sleeves folded he is a busy man. He waves frantically to the passing cars. They seen to be moving with trepidation lest they might get stuck in the water logged streets. 

Pappu has been waiting for this. He rushes to one such car which has got stuck in spite of the best intentions of the driver. You could see him in knee deep water pushing the car out of the puddle. The driver happy to be out of the situation offers him money which Pappu coyly accepts. Well the rain has been a blessing in disguise for Pappu; he is going to have a busy day in office today.

So that is the story of Pappu the man with the indomitable spirit. A man whom circumstances could not cast their ugly shadow. A man whom doubt could not bend.. His spirit, his resilience, his never say die attitude in the face of adversity is the stuff legends are made of.  But Pappu is an unsung legend. No one dare write or talk about him for fear of attracting ridicule. You see he is no news maker. He is just an ordinary guy trying to fathom the inscrutable ways of the world. 

Meanwhile the rains have stopped. 

Seems his prayers have been answered at last!

Why does God give us so much pain?

Tuesday...March 27/2012....09:20 a.m. the doctor rushed in to inform Khoka that he has been blessed with a baby boy. Even before he could react the doctor said they were not able to save the new born, however the mother is safe.

It had been a long wait of about 4 years. Visits to doctors, listening to different family members,well wishers and endless hours spent before God praying for a baby.  When his wife gave him the amazing news that she had conceived his joy knew no bounds.  Finally God had heard his prayers.

But what today?  Did He who heard Khoka's prayers decide to withdraw his decision admitting on the sly that he had acted at the spur of the moment. Did God realize his folly? But why did he take so long to decide this? Or is he a sadist?

Eight months the baby was the only topic of discussion for Khoka and his wife.  Did Gublu ( that is what they called him) move? What is Gublu doing?  Did he kick now?  He would call from his office in the middle of a meeting to inquire about Gublu.  And the first time Gublu kicked..he could almost feel the wife's excitement at the other end of the line; she had called him to give him the great news. Oh! how he wished he was home at that time to hug his wife and feel Gublu's movement.

But what today? How would he face his wife?  She had been in excruciating pain just couple of hours ago..how would she take this news? Just then the nurse wheeled in his wife..she seemed to be sleeping soundly after the pangs of childbirth.  Khoka just could not control himself. The ground beneath his feet seemed to melt away. He bent over and kissed her forehead.  A drop of warm tear fell on her!

Does God really know and understand a mother's heart? The doctor report said that the baby could not live due to it being under weight.  Intra uterine growth restriction (IUGR) is what their terminology said. Everything was  fine till the seven months of pregnancy. Then a routine doctor visit said  that the wife's amniotic fluid was very less. This news had an adverse effect on her blood pressure. It shot up without any provocation. But the question remains the same..why did God choose to play spoil sport when everything was going fine? And also when this was detected why did the doctor not have the sense to treat it...she waited for two weeks to decide that Khoka's wife needs to be admitted to the hospital for intravenous hydration. What was going on in the doctor's mind? Did she not have her free will ? Or was she acting on God's behest?  Was this all a divine design? If yes for what purpose?  Questions like this started tormenting Khoka.

Gublu was fine till the last evening. Khoka could clearly hear his heart beat when the doctor came  for the routine checkup. The wife's blood pressure had shot up to almost 170mmHg which posed a major risk for both the mother and the baby. He asked the doctor if everything was fine. The doctor said in such cases C-section is not advised;however one could not even let the baby remain in the womb for long. The baby was not able to draw nutrition due to the mother's high blood pressure.  Khoka and his wife had also observed this ..the baby's movement had become very weak. The wife could hardly feel Gublu's kicks. The only option is to induce labor pain and try and deliver the baby through the normal procedure. Oh! how he prayed the entire night hoping everything would be fine the next day.

The wife suddenly opened her eyes.  She inquired about the baby. The nurse told her that the baby was born weak and had difficulty in breathing hence was kept in the incubator. She looked at Khoka for an affirmation. Khoka lied!  He could not be in the room anymore. He was fighting hard to stop the deluge of emotions that hit him. He rushed out. Relatives who were with the couple starting consoling Khoka. At the moment nothing mattered; Khoka could only see moving figures...the world stopped existing for him.

By the time he re-entered the hospital room he had literally buried his past. He first looked at his hands and then his wife's face. He did not know why he did this? The wife was now awake and asked if he had any news about the baby.  She implored him to go to the incubator room to see if the baby was fine. Questions like.."Has someone fed my Gublu? Did the doctor check on Gublu? Why is no one talking about Gublu?..." hit him from all directions. He looked at his hands again. But could not muster the courage to tell her that  these same hands had buried their dear Gublu. Oh! imagine a father's sorrow. With the same hands he wanted to rock his baby's cradle!

The wife asked again. He lied again silently praying that this lie of his should assure him a place in the dark alleys of hell. Hearing the affirmation from her husband the wife slept peacefully thinking her newborn is in safe hands and will be united with her soon. Khoka too lay down. But sleep eluded him.

Why does God give us so much pain?  It is because he wants to instill a fear in us by reminding us that he is the almighty, all powerful who can wield his power any time to subdue us into submission.  Or is it the cycle of karma that our pains and sufferings are a result of our past lives? If if it is karma then whose? Khoka's, his wife's or Gublu's? If it is Khoka's then why punish his wife? Or if it is the wife's then why punish the baby who lived for only ten minutes. Or if it the baby's karma then why did it choose Khoka and his wife as its parents only to give them pain and suffering for a lifetime?

Hard questions but hardly any answers. Meanwhile the wife now knows the truth. Khokha and she are slowly coming to terms with their new life - a life without Gublu and his kicks!